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Ben Bernanke’s Blog

Upon being named Chairman of the Federal Reserve, Ben Bernanke became the leader of the free world in 2006. Coming from the academy, he is expected to be the more transparent than the reticent Alan Greenspan whom he replaces. Critics however have decried a series of communications slip-ups under his watch and labeled him "Helicopter Ben," a reference to a comment he made about dropping money from the sky to fight deflation.

Stimulating the economy one bull at a time

By Ben Bernanke

Courtesy U.S. Treasury and Federal Reserve

While many other economists are saying that the chances of a recession are 50/50, Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson and me know that that kind of economic self-hatred thinking can only lead to a recession. Before we testified to Congress, Hank told me Citibank was known for negative thinking, while Goldman Sachs (his alma mater) always focused on the upside and “kicked ass”. We watched The Secret together, and decided that positive thinking and self-love was the way to revive the economy, along with deficit-creating tax rebates and inflation-causing interest rates cuts.

So we told the unenlightened Senate Banking Chairman Christopher Dodd (who compared this economy to 9/11) to lighten up since there is no recession.

2/14/2008 4:55 PM, Washington DC
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Putting the "serve" back in Federal Reserve

By Ben Bernanke

Bio & Blog

toaster.jpgWe’ve been working diligently here at the Fed to fix the economy. As I’ve learned over the past few months, running the money supply involves more than economic calculations. If there’s anything Commerce Bank has shown us, it’s that people don’t care much about interest rates if you can make them feel good.

Here’s our plan:

Make the law makers feel less ignorant about economics:

2/13/2008 7:22 PM, Washington DC
1 comment

Ben Bernanke 2010

By Ben Bernanke

Bio & Blog

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It appears the media is already taking its eye off the 2008 presidential election to focus on the 2010 Federal Reserve chairmanship appointment. The problem is that allowing politicians to choose the best Fed Chairman is as absurd as allowing the Fed Chairman to appoint generals in the armed forces.

What this country needs is a constitutional amendment allowing for direct election of the Fed Chairman. If I had a clear mandate from the people, perhaps I could really get things done in this economy rather than having to please a bunch of frat-boy bankers.

2/1/2008 7:26 PM, Washington DC
6 comments

MoRons bring mo problems not mo money

By Ben Bernanke

Bio & Blog

The followers of Ron Paul (aka Paultards) are antagonizing me and subverting our highly perfected central banking system once more, this time with a propagandistic YouTube video (via DealBreaker):

We all know that central banking wasn’t part of the original constitution and was, in fact, despised by the Founding Fathers. But central banking was an important addition to our nation that our forefathers did not have the vision to foresee, as important to the advancement of humanity as the 13th Amendment.

1/25/2008 12:00 PM, Washington DC
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What does it take to avoid a recession? Brass balls

By Ben Bernanke

Bio & Blog

brass-balls.jpgI’ve already stated that if you do not fear a recession, it will not occur. To put it in terms the average fratty Wall Street trader would comprehend, you need brass balls.

I was hesitant to cut rates drastically because I thought Wall Street banks had some balls. They didn’t, and are now downsizing and firing CEOs. Then I thought the big buyout private equity shops still had some balls. It turned out their balls were just highly leveraged. Private equity kings like Steve Schwarzman and co. are now begging the Arabs for debt. Even Bill Gates is being nice. Venture capitalists may be our only hope.

1/24/2008 4:19 PM, Washington DC
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I am full of bull

By Ben Bernanke

Bio & Blog

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Photo by babblingdweeb via Flickr.

After my bold and decisive economic action yesterday, Wall Street is at ease again knowing Ben Bernanke is looking after them like the precious economic actors they are. I put the hand chains on the cruel invisible hand of the market that spanked them once yesterday, but not again today. Stocks have bounced back.

Willem Buiter at the Financial Times is surely regretting his words from yesterday accusing me of “buttock-clenching monetary policymaking”.

Goldman Sachs “economist” Jan Hatzius is doing some careful double-speak in the AFP:

1/23/2008 11:01 PM, Washington DC
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The bigger the rate cut, the harder Wall Street falls in love with me

By Ben Bernanke

Bio & Blog

rebound.gifI’ve figured out Greenspan’s secret. When times are bad, just make a drastic cut in interest rates. It doesn’t cost me anything out of my own pocket, yet it will probably increase the size of my book deal down the road.

This rate cut has also had the pleasant effect of ending clear criticism from investment bank “economists”. For example, Goldman’s Jan Hatzius (who’s been begging me for this cut and discrediting my good name in the press) had only this to say according to the New York Times:

1/22/2008 8:12 PM, New York
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If you do not fear the recession, it will not occur

By Ben Bernanke

Bio & Blog

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via garibaldi on Flickr

The pessimistic opinions of two uninformed continents (Europe and Asia) should not influence a wise student of economics. Just because they’re worried about a U.S. recession doesn’t mean you should be too.

The markets are closed today in honor of a great American leader. What does great leadership entail? Being optimistic about the future, not worrying about the Dow futures market being down 500 points. That’s why my old boss, George Bush, and I are encouraging you to spend rather than worry.

Please put down your Wall Street Journal, and visit these web sites:

1/21/2008 9:55 PM, New York
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Et tu, Paul Krugman?

By Ben Bernanke

Bio & Blog

What’s the scariest date to remember for Americans?

9/19

That was the day Arthur Sulzberger, Jr. finally figured out TimesSelect was a bad idea. (I once had the chance to meet Arthur, and it was clear he slept through the Econ 101 microeconomics section on what to do when one has no marginal cost.)

Now anyone, without having to indulge in such stupidity, can read the New York Times columnists. This creates a tragedy of the commons in which all these pseudo-intellectual columnists fight for pageviews by preying on the gullible, hoping advertisers will pay to access such gullibility. In doing so, sadly, they may ruin the prosperous economy those advertisers want to reach — ultimately causing the New York Times to be taken over by Murdoch or the Arabs. Case in point: Paul Krugman’s latest item, Don’t Cry for Me, America.

1/21/2008 12:00 PM, Washington DC
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Donald Trump tries to think big, but doesn't kick ass

By Ben Bernanke

Bio & Blog

trump_book.jpgThe Observer says “Ben is the new Rosie.”

The Donald thinks I should read his underselling new book Think Big And Kick Ass In Business And In Life.

In truth, we all know the only people getting their ass kicked by Trump are the unfortunate workers at his SoHo construction site, conveniently omitted from this Fox News interview.

1/18/2008 6:57 PM, New York
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