Seriously, guys. What’s the deal with this whole “strike” thing the writers are doing? Apparently I’m not allowed to go off and make any more blockbusters until this thing is over, which is a total bummer. Writers are like tampons for dudes — unnecessary.
I do it without scripts any way. I mean, seriously guys, did any of you think that my movies were written? No way, man. Not how the Rat-man operates. I just go “Yo, Chris Tucker! Say something hilarious and then punch that guy!” And he does it! And it’s instant money in the bank, boyee! No money wasted on those friggin’ “writers” and audiences eat that crap up. It’s win-win. I mean, check this out, look at this blog entry. I wrote it … but am I in the WGA? Nope. And its still awesome as hell! See? (INSERT MUSHROOM CLOUD EXPLOSION)
Who needs writers? Those execs just gotta have faith in the directors, like me. I mean, on the first day of Rush Hour, all I had was some Asian dude and Chris Tucker and no clue what the hell we were doing. And look what happened!
But now I can’t even get wasted at the award shows. You cannot convince me that those things are written either. This whole thing is whack, yo.
Ratner OUT brahs
Joe:
Am I the only one who understands satire? Or how to read "These Blogs Are Not Real"?
1/28/2008 2:28 AMmonalisab:
Maybe you don't need writers to make the crappy action movies that you do, but there are some of us out there who like movies and TV shows that are more than just crap. Could you imagine what Amores Perros, 21 Grams, or Babel would have been like if Alejandro González Iñárritu hadn't had Guillermo Arriaga to write those screenplays? You probably have no idea what I'm talking about, which would only prove my point that you're an ignorant a** who is capable of making crap and nothing more. And since you know nothing about making movies that have depth and sensitivity, I would suggest that you shut your mouth since you obviously don't understand why writers are important. You are not the entire entertainment industry, so don't try to represent them.
Even if writers weren't important, it isn't fair that they only make 4 cents for every DVD that the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers (AMPTP) sells and they charge about $20. The writers are only asking for 8 cents! Out of $20! And as far as web content and other new media is concerned, they usually earn NOTHING even though the AMPTP makes loads of money off of ad revenue there, too, so why shouldn't writer's get paid the same rate that they get for broadcast TV? That part of the market is only getting bigger and it might even replace broadcast TV one day. Writers will still need to eat, pay medical bills, pay their rent/mortgage, etc. if that happens, and $0 wouldn't cut it.
If the AMPTP makes money off of something that writers have contributed to then they should earn a decent cut, period. They are human beings, not slaves. And if you really think they're being whiny, maybe you should try working for the same rate that they are getting right now and stop being such a hypocrite.
BTW, this blog post sucks, and I bet a writer would have done it better.
1/20/2008 3:22 AMSteven:
Enormous amounts of money is generated from the various media produced in the industry. A simple question to ask is how should these profits be divided?
1/18/2008 2:22 AMDarren:
I agree with Kris (without the "F" words). The writers get paid a good amount for the "Hard" work that they do. They should not worry about getting a kick back every time a movie is rented, shown on TV or viewed on a personal computer. We do not need TV and Movies. It is not something that you need to live like food and water. There are plenty of new writers waiting for a chance to get into the business. When the air traffic controllers tried to strike Ronny fired them all and we still were able to fly. It is time that the unions took a hike and stopped wrecking the economy of our country. Why not do to all the strikers what any other industy would do. Fire them and hire all new writers at a lower rate. It is only business.
1/19/2008 4:24 PMSteve:
Fuck you Brett Ratner, you're a spoiled little rich kid that got handed
1/19/2008 10:15 AMall your connections. By the way RH 3 was pathetic & how many million were you over budget?
Go back to directing music videos.
kris:
FUCK THE WRITERS THE ONLY ONES SUFFERING ARE THE VIEWERS...THEY GET PAID PLENTY ...GO BACK TO WORK YOU LAZY FUCKS
1/18/2008 12:56 AMPuch:
I'm sick of all this "Poor Writers" Crap. If a writer doesn't like the deal, DONT TAKE THE JOB!
WHY AREN'T THEY STRIKING AT THE MOVIE THEATRES, IF THEY WANT THE PRODUCERS TO FEEL THE EFFECT!! Because they are still making money, while all the innocent victims like the people behind the cameras are just plain out of work.
THIS STRIKE IS THE MOST SELFISH, POWER PLAY IN GUILD HISTORY.
Remember theses guys are a "Guild" not a UNION!! It's more like a club. Don't compare this ego game to the valid strikes of many hard working people across the U.S. The Sanitation workers, Steel workers, Grocery Store Employees, Coal Miners, & UAW. These are unions that deserve respect, not some writer.
When a real Strike happens, there are people on the picket lines 24hrs a day, day after day until it is resolved.
THESE PANSY ANSS WRITERS TOOK A "HIATUS" FOR WINTER. WTF.
THE PICKET FROM 8AM TO 5PM. WTF
And as far as getting their share: If that "Guild" is so strong, then why can't they rely on their members to not take a job that doesn't give them the residual they want.
No, the job of the writers can't be sent overseas because there is an undeniable level of talent that they possess. THIS IS NOT THE QUESTION!!!
Just like with Actors & Pro Athletes, Writers have agents who negotiate their contracts prior to accepting a job. WHY DON'T THEY PUT THEIR AGENTS IN THE POSITION TO DELIVER THEM A GOOD DEAL.
THE LARGEST PORTION OF A FILM/TV CREW WORKS 12 OR MORE HOURS A DAY, BASED ON WHAT THEY ARE TOLD TO DO. They don't have the daily freedoms that writers do. These people have had to e on time and deliver quality work in order to keep working. SO WHY IS THE WRITERS STRIKE KEEPING THEM OUT OF WORK.
LAST: IF AND WHEN A WORKING CLASS UNION GOES ON STRIKE, I'LL BE LOOKING TO SEE HOW MANY WRITERS LOSE A DAY OF WORK!!! NO MORE"POOR WRITERS"!!
Some WGA members get paid to strike. Not much, but they still get paid!
1/22/2008 11:47 PMAlan:
No, Joe, I understood it too, and I was really surprised when I read the comments. People should buy a dictionary and look for words such as "sarcasm" or "irony". A great post, by the way, at least for those of us who really understood its meaning.
1/31/2008 3:53 PMDenise McMullin:
Writers get nowhere near the credit they deserve compared to actors and actresses. Don't forget with a bad script nobody wants to watch the movie.
How about all these so called A list actors with movies that flop. Then look at all the no name actors that come out with hit movies. The no name actors get paid a decent wage until they get one hit then they expect a huge wage and forget about everyone else like the writer who wrote the script deserve. If a book by a famous writer flops they don't get paid as much and have to give back any advancement that goes beyond what was made.
I say distribute the money more evenly and make everyone happy, not just the actors. Everyone should benefit from a sucessful movie. After all it took everyone right down to the makeup artist to make the actors look good.
Let us not forget it also the director that makes the actor look good.
1/25/2008 12:07 AMSeth:
Dude, you directed Rush Hour. You're like a poor man's Kevin Smith, which is just sad, considering
1/27/2008 6:11 PMhe's the ultimate hack. I could understand if you were a true filmmaker, but you're not. You need writers
because you sign off you blogs with "Ratner out brahs". Also let's face it, they could have hired alot of
other overweight, talentless directors to direct Rush Hour, and it still would have been just as awful.
You can't even write an interesting blog, imagine an entire script. Maybe your parents can buy one for you.
Also, in case I didn't mention it earlier...you're fat.
Quietus:
No, Mauricio, you idiot, Brett Ratner did not write this blog. An amateur writer from the INTERNET wrote it. It was PARODYING Brett Ratner. And if you do not understand this, then perhaps you should not have a job as a writer.
2/5/2008 5:45 AMDenise McMullin:
Actually DUDES some people just google topics they are interested in, like I did and come across a few comments like the ones above mine. I hardly think it's worth complaining about considering , it still means people are going to the site. Actually I never heard of this site before but I was googling info about the writers strike and this was near the top of the list. I'm sure Brett doesn't care as long as it brings people to his site.
2/3/2008 3:08 PMMichael:
I think it's obvious Brett was kidding and fully understands the need for writers, or he is a moron. So he either has a good sense of humor and handle on things, or a complete loser moron. I can't be for sure because I didn't really read what he wrote, I kinda got lost in the mushroom cloud explosion, all it needs is a catch phrase.
2/8/2008 5:55 PMMauricio:
Ha, ha. Brilliant. That Ratner's post has "Irony" written all over it. But it looks like nobody gets it. As a writer, I know how hard that job is, even though people may think it's the easiest thing on earth. Maybe that's why we've been watching a lot of crappy movies in the last decade. Perhaps that is the reason why 20 out of 21 movies coming up are either a comic book adaptation or the prequel of the remake of a movie made 50 years ago.
2/2/2008 5:10 PMThere's a lack of fresh ideas and certainly this strike does not make things easier. My question is: if someone like Tom Cruise earns $25.000.000 per movie, why can't they give the writers 4 more lousy cents of royalties? Is that so hard? You think you can do it without the writers? Good luck... you are going to need it. Thank god they have a lot of Seinfeld episodes to rerun, but people will get tired of that eventually.
renee:
I also googled it and had no idea that it was a joke, i thought the guy was just a douche bag. It is a lot funnier knowing that just some random person wrote under his name, and that some othere random people took offense to it so much. Just goes to show that we really dont need writers just reality tv. (JK)
2/9/2008 9:13 PM