Photo by Chepner via flickr.

These days, some members of the “scientific community” seem to think that anything can be explained by a few genes running willy-nilly in the brain — from bullying to adultery to paganism and now, as of yesterday, to allergies. As Dr. Phil, I’ve always driven home the importance of taking responsibility for your own life. And the truth is, just like bed wetting or being a homo, allergies are a sign of deep psychological issues.

But I’m here for you. To help you out, I’ve compiled a list of four easy steps for conquering your allergies, based on my own triumph over my allergy to peanuts.

Dr. Phil Presents: Behaving Your Way to Body Responsibility In Four Easy Steps

1. Define your payoffs, then cut them out. You’re getting something from your allergic reactions, or else you wouldn’t keep having them. Maybe you like shame and guilt because you’re afraid of success. Or maybe anaphylactic shock gives you the only chance to take a Wednesday off work. Whatever the payoff, Cut It Out.
2. Set priorities. These would be priorities like eating peanuts and not having an allergic reaction to them.
3. Make a strategy. Decide to eat peanuts and decide not to have an allergic reaction when you do.
4. Find a vision. As people who’ve read my book, Life Matters, in either hardback or paperback or listened to the CD or the CD-ROM companion to it (all available at my online store) know, successful people always envision their success before they set out to accomplish it. So picture yourself eating peanuts. Imagine yourself standing in front of that can of Planters nuts, the one with that little peanut man on the can. That peanut man, well, he wants the worst for you. He’s mocking you, and he wants you to fail and to be allergic. So I want you to look that peanut man in his little cartoon eye, and I want you to say to him: “Watch this, Mr. Planters nuts.” And eat a nut. And after that, eat another nut. And eat the rest of the nuts. And do NOT break out in hives.