“Morons,” I said spitting some tabbacy on the floor. “I’ve got morons working for me.”

I’m in South Carolina meeting with my staff, the same staff that told me I couldn’t win no election by sittin’ on the back porch in Lawrenceburg drinking ’shine and just hintin’ that I’se gonna run for election — like that Jew mayor from New York’s doin’ right now (except instead of drinking ’shine, he’s banging all the broads Giuliani 911 left stuffed in closets and drawers). “No, no, no,” my staff says “You got to announce your running, and go freeze your fat Southern ass off in Iowa and New Hampshire. That’s the only way to win.”

So here’s the funny thing, I done all that, froze my ass off, and know what I got? Less votes than all the guys who sat at home unannounced, drinking ’shine and banging 9/11’s whores.

Hell, thanks to these morons I even finished behind Ron Paul and that moron actually put in writing that he hated blacks and gays. Hell all Republicans hate blacks and gays. I ain’t no different, but I sure as hell am smart enough not to put it in writin’ where people can read it.