Booooyaaaah America!  Well despite Helicoptor Ben's best efforts, the sky IS falling and it IS fully time to freak out!

Now I'm not talking about a mini, "should we sell the second home and manage our expenses more closely?" freak out. No, no. I'm talking about a "hoard canned food and kill anyone that gets to close to your property" freak out. Things are going to hell in a hand basket -- and quickly -- so prepare now while you still can.

Stock up on the essentials: non-perishable food, access to fresh water, ammo and pornography. I imagine the post collapsed-economy world to be somewhere between Mad Max and Johnny Mnemonic (easily Keanu Reeves' best work). Keep some children around as they can be put to work in the fields or eaten if, God forbid, the Dow drops below 10,000. And for goodness sake don't waste your time with dollar bills. They are useless. Just a fancy form of toilet paper these days. (And on that front, Big Jim recommends Charmin Ultrasoft.)

On the bright side with the onset of Armageddon, there are fewer consequences for anti-social behavior. Once you have your stockpile, feel free to punch your boss in the face or grab that cute secretary's ass.

This guy has the general idea. Shoot first and ask questions later. And remember in this strange new world the best part of waking up isn't Folgers in your cup, its that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep and steal your spam hoard.