Boobies. Boobies. Boobies. That’s all anyone wants to talk about. There was more to that photoshoot people. Like my crack. And how resurrecting the image of the quintessential media-birthed starlet, whose creation and destruction were fawned by public obsession, draws attention to that problem which is now accelerated in Hollywood due to the 5-hour news cycle, the deterioration of high culture and the housing crisis. I mean duh.

But I’d like to take this opportunity to respond to some of the many comments I’ve received from people. I could take a representative sample from all over the web, but instead I’ve chosen commenters on TMZ only.

Is this picture for the women or for the gays?
Posted at 10:15AM on Feb 18th 2008 by Tim

It’s for gay women. Did I just blow your cock?

She is so ugly! Fire Crotch!!!!!!!
Posted at 10:21AM on Feb 18th 2008 by bahaha

What! My crotch is on fire? Holy shit. Oh my God, let me check … OK, that was not funny. My crotch was not on fire. Whoever wrote this is the same person who screams about fires in a movie theaters to incite riots.

Her ta-tas are hanging kinda low. They been man-handled too many times! LOL
Posted at 10:35AM on Feb 18th 2008 by Huntington Beach Babe

Duly noted. Actually not too long ago, I instituted a mandatory hook-up contract that states all fondly, groping and man-handling must occur in an upwards moving motion.

As an experienced photographer I would have posed her with a breast pump and had her lactating into it.
Posted at 10:38AM on Feb 18th 2008 by eric

OMG! Were you on the set? That pic is in the outtakes, next to the one of me in overalls with no undershirt dry humping a piece of drift wood with a mariachi band and a midget in the background.

You’re ugly and your freckles are ugly, blonde does NOT look good on you, your nipples look like salami. The only talent you have is doing lines and drinking till 6am.
Posted at 10:56AM on Feb 18th 2008 by J

Salami, really? I’ve gotten prosciutto and a few other cured meats, but never salami. And thanks for the compliment about the partying, but honestly the true heroes stay out until McDonalds stops their breakfast service. Circa 10:30 am.