An eleven-year-old girl, raped by three young men. The accused have been arrested, but their parents say that the charges are inappropriate! We’re to believe these rapists deserve leniency, just because they are eight and nine years old? BA. LO. NEE.
So what
Parents, waste no time teaching your kids to accuse people of things. I plan on spending the next few years ensuring my new baby daughter Lucy’s first words are “SEXUAL ASSAULT.” Until then, she’ll have to learn how to use a rape whistle.
Good news, friends. The vultures are circling Drew Peterson, husband and MURDERER of AT LEAST two women. And although I could close both of these cases while breastfeeding, we must be patient and let the district attorney take his time.
In the meantime, we must act before SOMEONE IS MURDERED AGAIN. Our justice system failed Stacy Peterson, and it failed Laci Peterson. We must act now to save Tracy Peterson. The man above is named Earl Peterson of 41 Fox Glenn Road in Brownsville, Delaware. Happily married for twenty-seven years to a lovely woman NAMED TRACY. He must be arrested and IMPRISONED IMMEDIATELY before this lovely woman is killed on OUR WATCH.
Well, friends, I’m back in the hospital. I noticed that something was wrong on the way to church. I tried to scream “PERVERT” at a man who was LEERING at my beautiful baby daughter, and I found myself dizzy and short of breath. I can deal with the hospitalization; my only regret is my husband let the pervert GET AWAY. Idiot.
The doctors say I have blood clots in my lungs. BLOOD CLOTS? I will NOT be done away with by BLOOD CLOTS. What kind of way is that to go? It doesn’t even give my loved ones the opportunity to blame anyone! And as any psychologist worth a darn will tell you, blame and impotent RAGE are the healthiest ways to move past any trauma.
Because the girl was born after the clocks changed, doctors insist that she is 26 minutes older, even though SHE CAME OUT SECOND! A strange quirk of Daylight Savings Time? Or a case of perverted doctors setting their watches for the baby’s eighteenth birthday so they can get a little BARELY LEGAL ACTION before the girl has been alive for exactly eighteen years.
The twins are here! A little earlier than expected, but the doctors induced labor for the babies’ sake after discovering some fluid in my lungs and unusually high levels of rage pulsing through my veins. INDUCE LABOR? PREMATURE BIRTH? TOO MUCH RAGE? Are you a DOCTOR — or a –
I’m sorry. I’ve lost my train of thought. I’m still a little woozy, and I’m not quite myself yet. I’ve spent the last two or three days in bed, screaming at inanimate objects. Not that they don’t deserve it. I KNOW WHAT YOU DO AT NIGHT WHEN YOU THINK I’M ASLEEP, BOOKSHELF.
FINALLY, some good news to report. Parents in Anderson, South Carolina and Roanoke, Virginia do not have to worry about taking their children trick or tonight. Sex offenders are being ROUNDED UP and held IN CAPTIVITY for the night.
Parents have problems on Halloween — hidden razorblades, roving gangs of teenagers, DRUNK DRIVERS, nuts dressed up like Ron Paul — without having to worry about their children being molested very quickly within three feet of them.
Normally I stay away from terrorism (if the story is not about something horrible happening to a beautiful white woman or some perfectly healthy babies, my mind tends to wander), but the Department of Homeland Security needs our help. Michelle Malkin, ever vigilant, reminds us that Shoe bombs are making a comeback. And she’s not shy about racially profiling:
It would have helped to know more about the people involved with carrying around these shoes in Europe. I’m guessing they weren’t Irish Catholics.
I couldn’t agree more, all it takes to nip these MOCCASIN MUNITIONS in the bud are a few minor law enforcement strategies:
The news out of Broomfield, Colorado: A young unlicensed driver gets behind the wheel of a car and CRASHES it…INTO A TRANSFORMER, knocking out the electricity and telephone service for the entire neighborhood. The most SHOCKING part of the story? Not that the boy is only six-years-old. But that investigators DO NOT PLAN ON FILING CHARGES.
How will our children ever learn to be upstanding moral citizen if we don’t throw them behind bars at the first sign of trouble? This boy took his grandmother’s car — without permission — and slammed it into a pole. Damage to public property, tampering with electrical system, vandalism, GRAND THEFT AUTO. I’m up to a 75-year sentence already, STOP ME WHEN YOU’VE HAD ENOUGH!
A Kansas City man, convicted of murder. Now back on the streets, after serving only 11 years behind bars. The prosecutor who sent him to prison was told that there was nothing he could do about it. But that prosecutor WOULDN’T TAKE “NO” FOR AN ANSWER.
Bill Peterson is a prosecutor in Oklahoma who is bringing a libel suit against Dennis Fritz. Fritz was convicted of murder before being EXONERATED because DNA “evidence” “proved” that he was “wrongly” “imprisoned.” He has since written a DEFAMATORY BOOK about the experience, and NOW, he’s being forced to PAY THE PIPER.
A SHOCKING new book, covering the unresolved Duke lacrosse rape case, hitting bookshelves. Stuart Taylor and KC Johnson — The SO-CALLED “AUTHORS” of the book — have APPARENTLY decided that the case is closed, even though it hasn’t yet been brought to trial.
The “BOOK” criticizes the New York Times and ME in particular for what they consider to be a “rush to judgment” concerning these Duke lacrosse players. EXCUSE ME? This book is typical of the kind of NONSENSE that passes for defense these days: Blame the victim for bringing false charges against innocent bystanders and then blame the prosecution for taking those accusations at face value without examining the evidence. GIVE ME A BREAK. If district attorneys were forced to examine evidence before going to trial, we’d never get anything done.
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