Lost in all the hubbub about seating the Florida and Michigan delegates, today's end of the primary season, my being only 35 delegates away from formally clinching the nomination, and, oh yeah, HILLARY'S IMPENDING CONCESSION, are the voters whose voices were tragically silenced. 

No, not the black voters who have been disenfranchised by decades of implicit and systemic racism.  No, not the good, hardworking, Christian folks who have been hoodwinked by the Republican Party into supporting an administration that has done nothing but use them.  I talk about the most marginal of the marginal, a demographic that has been continuously ignored, especially throughout this primary season: OLD, WHITE, RACIST, FEMALE, HILLARY SUPPORTERS FROM MANHATTAN:

I know this video has been making the rounds on Youtube (1,000,000 views already???  Only, like 20 million more to catch up with Chocolate Rain) but, come on people, why can't Harriet Christian catch a break in this world that has so forsaken her??  Sure she comes off like an older, more Alzheimer-y Geraldine Ferraro, but she raises some valid points:

1. I am indeed an inadequate black man.  Mainly because I'm only half black.  I can play basketball, but I can't dunk.  I can talk jive, but I don't have an enormous penis.  I have children, but I'm married to their mother.

2. This lady HAS been treated like a "second-class citizen", IF NOT WORSE.  Think about it this way: before the end of slavery, blacks were counted at 3/5, or 60%, of a person in national censuses when it came to the distribution of electoral votes.  Hillary supporters (most of them probably old and fart-y like Harriet) in Michigan and Florida were only allowed to seat 1/2, or 50%, of their delegates.  What's larger, 60 or 50?  Hillary supporters are being treated LESS FAIRLY than slaves.

3. The CIA and the FBI ARE ACTUALLY after her.  Most of the time when old lunatics think the government is after them, it's for attention or because the orderlies gave them the wrong dose of Zoloft, but Harriet has a point here.  As a member of the United States Senate, I can say with full confidence that for many years the government, in consort with the Chinese, the Jews, and the Nation of Islam has been constantly interfering with the brain waves of well-to-do, elderly Manhattanite women.  In fact, the Internet was invented JUST TO CONFUSE THEM.  As were remote controls and dimmer switches.

4. John McCain will be the next President of the United States.  Wait, let's put the sarcasm on hold for a second- I actually believe this is true. Why? Because of crazy, obnoxious, racist old people like Harriet Christian.