Let’s take a trip down memory lane to discuss a commercial totally unrelated to the one I am reviewing before veering off into a diatribe against Comcast and finally getting to the point of the article.

The year is 2003 and Crispin, Porter + Bogusky’s is launching their first campaign, mimicking a little-known television show from England, The Office, to sell hamburgers. I hate the spot because it is relevant to people who are younger than I and listen to loud music. Loud music frightens and irritates me.

Comcast also irritates me. I have been waiting since September to get television and internet service at my house, and they still haven’t turned up! Mark me down as skeptical that it will ever happen.

How can I review the new Monster.com spot by BBDO without television and internet at home, you may ask? The answer is simple: I’m Bob Fucking Garfield and I know everything about advertising.

Here’s the synopsis: The ad has high production values because BBDO spots always have high production values. The spot tells a nice story because ads by David Lubars always tell nice stories. Where it falls down is a silly detail, because I only care about irrelevant details. That irrelevant details makes me hate the spot.

See? I don’t even need to see the spot to review it. That’s advertising brilliance, baby.