Between producing art, building a time machine (to go back in time and save Africa from Colonialism, duh) and prank calling George W. Bush to make lame-duck quacking noises in his ear, I don’t have a lot of free time. In the rare minutes I do have (i.e., when I’m taking a dump), I read.
For some reason, Billboard interviewed my longtime knob twiddler (heh heh) Daniel Lanois the other day, even though I’ve made it perfectly clear to my soon-to-be-former publicist that I am available for interviews night and day.
Unbelievably, most of the interview was about Daniel’s music. I bet even he can’t name one song by him. Finally, the interviewer got around to my band.
“Q: U2 — we’d be remiss if we didn’t ask how it was going.”
That’s not even a proper question. And does the interviewer think Danny’s in U2? (A: He’s not. He’s French Canadian, not Irish.)
Lanois: “We’re going to try and break new sonic ground and deliver a masterpiece.”
Danny Boy’s correct if by “we’re” he means U2 (again, not a member). And if by “break new sonic ground” he means vaguely familiar tunes that could have been on “Achtung Baby” and the comeback desperation of “All That You Can’t Leave Behind,” plus my usual lyrics about nature, lights, beauty, etc. I may namecheck a few cities.
“The sleeves are rolled up.”
Who knows? I’ve been so immersed in songwriting, working with RED, G8 Summits – not to mention plastered on Guinness – to remember such details. I’m glad Daniel, on the other rolled-up-sleeve, has time to memorize the fucking garb. However, I do recall Larry Mullen Jr. rolling up his pant legs. Or were those capris?
“There’s so much material. When you get Eno and I and those guys in the room, before lunch there’s like eight things.”
Eight things, huh?
- One this one time at band camp joke.
- One complaint about my breath courtesy The Edge.
- One stale fart courtesy Larry Mullen.
- One cell call courtesy Adam Clayton’s girlfriend.
- One “this goes up to 11” joke.
- One “G8-you-sunk-my-battleship!” joke.
- One “you sing like a chick” joke (I think this is a joke).
- One call of “G8!” to which someone (Adam, usually) cries “BINGO!”
“We’ve had some exciting beginnings via jam sessions.”
Danny, you signed a treaty or whatever promising never to talk about those sessions! Oh, wait. That’s “jam” sessions. I thought you said “circle jerk sessions.” Never mind.