One hundred million dollars was secretly donated to the charities of Erie, PA by some tool named Anonymous Friend.
Charity is terrible. You know that, I know that. God knows that (Trump note: There is no God, only nothingness and despair). I’ll tell you who is behind this: Rosie – God of Cake. Only a weak, gross blob would give away that kind of purse without determining the optimal asset allocation or investing in REITs and credit derivatives.
Instead of dividing it equally among 46 charities, do it the Trump way. Give it to Trump. Ha! That was a joke. Although I will be appropriating 15 million for my charity, Finding Beauty Queens From Pathetic Poverty Places.
I’d suggesting putting the other 85 million in a cage. Then, admit a representative from each of the charities in the cage, along with a dull butter knife and a gun with one bullet, then …
Sorry, must go. I have a Trump Towers-sized erection (relative to smaller condo buildings). Vote Ron Paul.