And so continues our tumultuous courtship, Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia. I’ve read in the fascist papers that they are calling our love “shadowy” and “illegal”. If offering refuge and public support is “shadowy”, then I don’t wish to leave the shade. If supplying you with funding and munitions is “illegal”, then don’t bother explaining to me the law.

What we have is beyond the comprehension of lawmakers, intellectuals, government officials, and model train enthusiasts. So what if the weapons are outdated? Take these broken arms and learn to fight. My sweet FARC! Love is a faculty of the libido, and as such, my love is bottomless.

I understand your desire to take this slow, but perhaps in the future I could teach you a thing or two about state-appropriation? As you may have heard, I have a strong tradition of making my privates public, ;-)

(Photo credit: Associated Press)