From This is London (7/14/07):
A man from Shirley whose irritable bowel syndrome has made him unlucky in love has launched a dating website for people who suffer from embarrassing illnesses.
Craig Jex, 24, hopes his website - Irritated Being Single - will help people like him find love.
If there’s one thing that’s more taxing on your heart than greasy food, it’s loneliness. (I would know! At Indiana University, the only horny co-eds I ever saw were buying porn from me while I ate bacon in a corner!) And if there’s one thing that’s more taxing on your dating than being overweight, it’s having irritable bowels. But now there’s hope!
Imagine a romantic date in a fancy restaurant with candles and fine wine. You smile. She giggles. You compliment her taste, she blushes. Suddenly it hits you. You gotta go. Can’t say anything? Afraid to look into her loving face? Don’t worry, she already left … to the bathroom!
Dread long car trips? So does she. Fantasize about being constipated? She shares those dreams. Embarrassed by Depends? She owns stock.
So to my fan club (or at least 25% of you), don’t give up. The woman of your dreams is out there. (Or man! Or sandwich!)
And she might just walk out of that bathroom … and into your heart.
(And back to the bathroom again five minutes later.)