My pitiful erection from a few days ago? Water under the bridge.

I have awoken with new resolve. I will reclaim my image, beaten like a pinata by media thugs. I will show the nation of Japan that I am serious about keeping Japan on top. The first order of business? Check out these …

Look at them, aren’t they so cute? I don’t have any cats, but I’ve been thinking these Hello Kitty transformation kits would add some thrills to any amorous encounter. I’ve been contemplating getting one for my secretary. It’s been giving me an election all morning (Shh! Don’t tell a soul! And by soul, I mean my wife’s soul.). If fact, I’ve pictured it on every woman I’ve walked past this morning, and I don’t anticipate that changing into the afternoon hours.