I may be drunk on scotch but I can come up with better ideas for businesses to fund in my sleep than the TechCrunch 40. I call it the Tom Perkins Perky 10:
10) Virtual Food Stamps
An online virtual food stamps currency for poor and homeless people. It costs nothing for us to give to them and they can have all the virtual brown-bagged malt beverages they can find in virtual worlds. Question: Do we make their avatars virtually homeless?
9) Digital Cameras for Women
Have you ever seen a woman struggle to use a digital camera? I’ve seen slow-motion car accidents on YouTube that are easier to watch.
8) Windows 96
This takes the best version of Windows ever and adds USB and wi-fi support. Would kick Vista and OSX’s asses any day of the week.
How has a VC not invested in this darling of a web property yet?
6) Third Life
I don’t know what this means yet, but it’s a downloadable application and I’ve already got 7 million users to sign up. However, on average only 12 are ever signed in at the same time. Well, at least our usage stats are better than Second Life’s…
5) E-Ink Toilet Paper
The names says it all. Save the environment while wiping your ass.
4) ClubPuffin.com
Everyone knows puffins are cuter than penguins. If Disney is paying $700 million for Club Penguin, than this idea is worth at least $400 billion based upon the puffin-to-penguin cuteness multiple. (Author’s note: I heard that’s actually what eBay used to value Skype.)
3) P2P LBOs
Simple idea. Rich people (like me) buy poor people (like you) using high amounts of leverage. You get paid a small amount of money ($75) and in return you’re my “employee” for life.
2) b00bs-on-parade.com
This one is purely Tommy P’s conception. It’s a web 2.0 site where folks from around the world send in camera phone pix and video every time they encounter a Chesty La Rue, Busty St. Claire, or Hootie McBoob. It’ll command a premium valuation because it involves mobile, social media, photo & video sharing, and Web 2.0. Oh wait, hold on one minute……..Sequoia just called–they’re in for the Series B at 6x the Series A price, and they are accepting just a Board Observership.
1) Goo-Tube-Book-kype
It’s a better eBay meets del.icio.us. Unfortunate name though, eh?