I’m home the other night when I get a call from a friend. “You read your blog lately?” he asks me, and I tell him, “Hell naw, I just type that motherfucker — I got editors to read it for me.” So my friend says, “Well, damn, Sam, you might want to take a look at the comments sometime. I think you just got Jack-Thom’d.”
“What the fuck you mean, Jack-Thom’d?” I ask. And holy shit if my friend wasn’t right. Sam Jack got his ass Jack-Thom’d.
I don’t know much about Jack Thompson. All I know is that he has some ri-got-damn-diculous ideas about human nature. I ain’t no smarter than Jack Thom when it comes to explaining why a motherfucker would want to go postal on a huge swath of the population, and I ain’t gonna pretend to understand why. Jack can do that for all us. He thinks it’s his call of duty.
Here’s the quote he left in the comments of my previous post:
Why don’t you debate me on this issue of whether violent video games cause real world violence. I’ll do it anywhere, anytime. You name it.
I dare you.
Dare? Hell yeah, you dare Sam Jack and you damn well better expect a response. News Groper took him up on that shit. We spent all day emailing him, responding to his emails, working out a system to get this debate on the road. And at the last minute–I bullshit you like I’d bullshit Christ Almighty–the motherfucker bailed like Bowser at the end of level three of Super Mario.
He emailed us this:
You know, some people have died because of jerkballs like jackson and his spike tv vga award mentality, so I’ll take a pass. grow up.
First of all, what the fuck? Why dare me to debate, spend all day organizing that debate, then insult me and pull out like the Purple fucking Pie-Man coming on Strawberry Shortcake?
And then you call me a jerkball? What the fuck is a got-damn jerkball? Is that like a tribble with Parkinsons?
Yeah, I was on Spike TV making fun of your ass, but, damn dude, I was also in Snakes on a Plane, Changing Lanes and The Negotiator. I’m just as easy to make fun of as you. We ain’t got to hate on one another. Just remember how I was when you saw Black Snake Moan for the first got-damn time–can’t we get that feeling back?
Naw, man, I guess we can’t. Though I’d've so been down for some sudden-death video golf with you.
So the last thing I got to say is, y’all, Jack Thompson’s email signature is:
Sure, that quote is by G.K. Chesterton, but I bet Elton John’s said it a few times too.
Rosethorn:
Technically we are all real people here, we just use handles since we're not stupid enough to post our real information out there for anyone to steal in this day and age of phishers and identity thieves.
I wasn't at the event you claimed to have won, but from what I heard you acted like an immature and rude little kid, something that definitely means you lost, but then again how is this any different from every single other case you make? Every time you seem to make some statement about imminent victory, some letter or whatnot that will turn the whole case around in your favor, etc... but it hasn't ever happened yet.
It's time to wake up, smell the coffee, and realize you are screwed because nothing is actually going your way and saying it is doesn't change the underlying facts.
Your unwillingness to debate with the owner of this blog site, running away after it was set up, further gives me reason to believe that you lost badly before and you're afraid what a person who is likely ready and willing to rip apart your bullshit points can do to you in a debate.
Also, one quick question, after your disbarrment since your "good standing" ONLY means that you paid your membership fees and not that the entire bar doesn't have a solid case against you, what exactly are you going to say when you introduce yourself and end your posts with?
"Jack Thompson, who used to be in good standing with the Bar?"
"Jack Thompson, used to be a lawyer but isn't any more?"
Not that I'm really curious, frankly I don't care what you sign off as once you can't use what you think is your god given right to be as big a jackass as you can.
2/22/2008 4:16 PMdeadlytoque:
Also, Jack, while we're asking you to stop giving people named Thompson a bad name, can you stop giving lawyers a bad name? Most of us (lawyers) are well-educated, rational, normal people. I'm a lawyer, a pretty decent person, -and- a pretty hardcore video gamer. I've never harmed another human being, and yet I also spent numerous hours trying to kill everyone in Liberty City when I noticed that they printed the population in the manual for GTA3.
Saying you're "Jack Thompson, Attorney" doesn't buy you any extra credit; it just means that people think lawyers are whackjobs.
It's like Eddie Izzard said about transvestites: "J. Edgar Hoover: weirdo transvestite! Me? Executive transvestite! It's a broad community, broader, perhaps than you'd think..."
So, Jack Thompson: weirdo lawyer! Me? well-adjusted video-gamer lawyer! It's a -very- broad community.
2/22/2008 8:30 PMDon_J_Kharma:
look, we all know ya'll play dirty all the time, so as for giving lawyers a bad name, i'm pretty sure that's done already. and instead of kissing ass, why don't you just go somewhere and play hide-and-go-fuck-yourself? jackass thomboy is a dumbass. he's against the very rights our forefathers created.
2/9/2009 2:35 PMand so his ass will be handed to him as well as those other anti-americans, like bill o reilley, in due time. you wanna be part of that list? keep talkin.
ryuclan:
Again, oh wow. "Daring" someone to a debate then punking out? Wow dude, you are really something. I bet you thought it wasn't going to happen. NO! We gamers are about action. My man Sam aint gonna back down for nobody,
2/20/2008 3:28 PMnot even a lame ass dude like you. Just a tip...Go get a life. You'd think a lawyer would have more to do with
his time.
Paul:
Wow, Jack, please just stop acting like you're in any way morally superior to the rest of us. You've done nothing but show that your sense of morals is INFERIOR.
2/20/2008 8:20 PMAlso, you seriously show signs of a massive inferiority complex. Why else would you feel the need to constantly scream "JACK THOMPSON ATTORNEY AND YOU'RE NOT!!!" And I just laughed when I read a comment of yours in which you stated that it's a FACT that you're going to Heaven. Seriously, what kind of ego-maniacal "jerkball" does that? Last time I checked, God wasn't fond of self-righteous pricks. At least not from what I've read about Him.
Andy:
Once again Jack your ability to distinguish what is real and what is not has become blurred and confused.
The author of this blog IS a real person.
He just isn't Samuel L Jackson.
Hopefully now I've soothed your addled brain and assured you of his, well-'reality' you will be able to debate with this gentleman, this quite REAL gentleman-and accept your own invitation.
Failing that,if perchance you ever come to Blighty I'll be more than happy to give you a debate on political gaming issues.
I'll even support your stance on illegalising selling mature-rated games to minors (Its the law where I live).
Probably the only common ground we'll have mind you.
All the best,
Andy
2/20/2008 11:03 PMJames Thompson:
Jack... PLEASE shut the hell up .. and PLEASE change your last name .. your not a real Thompson .. Your pile of diarrhea dog shit coming out of my ears. (Thanks Angry Video Game Nerd!)
2/21/2008 2:31 AMray gearhart:
Dude looks like a young Merv Griffin
2/21/2008 7:15 PMJames Thompson:
Ugh .. Nice burn.. and Jack reall kills our family name... what a fucking douche (jerkballs? HAHAHA)
Ya but nice!
2/20/2008 2:30 PMCheesy:
Nice pussing out there J.T, really proving a point.
2/20/2008 2:14 PMDoc:
What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start!
2/21/2008 4:48 AMSonicmark:
In response to you "you gamer idiots." comment.
2/20/2008 7:43 PMI think you'll find Mr. Thompson, that I am perfectly intelligent.
Jack Thompson, Atto:
I participate in real debates with real people. I debated Lorne Lanning a few months ago in Philadelphia on a real stage in front of real video gamers. Kicked his butt, according to folks there. I don't debate phantoms.
Jack Thompson, Attorney and You're Not
2/20/2008 7:03 PMIan Wilson, Assho:
are you sure it was the real Lorne Lanning? like the ACTUAL Lorne Lanning and not just somebody dressed up to look and speak like Lorne Lanning? Because I mean, you don't exactly inspire confidence when it comes to picking out what is fact and leaving what is fiction.
Ian Wilson, Asshole and You're n... no wait, yeah, you're an asshole too. I'm just not as fucking retarded as you are.
5/9/2008 1:03 AMRMY:
"Jack Thompson, Attorney and You’re Not"
WTF? You're Alabama law licence was reascended and you're facing disbarment in Florida. You're hardly an upstanding member of the legal community. Seems you're an attorney only by the grace of god.
2/21/2008 3:29 PMPaul:
Another thing, Jack. Do you just sit around all day (when you aren't sending idiotic "threatening" e-mails to those in the game industry) googling your own name to find whatever tidbits anyone, ANYWHERE says about you? And I bet it arouses you when you do find something that mentions you, am I correct?
2/20/2008 8:47 PMYes, that was an immature comment, but I don't regret saying it after all of the immature, underhanded comments you've made regarding gamers. And it all comes from the same scum-like man you has the gall to act intellectually and morally superior to anyone who dares stand in his way. Disgusting.
Pheonic Wright, Atto:
OBJECTION!
Do you think its clever to similtaneously Insult millions of people all over the world Mr Thompson, i still don't see how one could rehearse massacres on counterstrike. ITS A GAME ABOUT COUNTERTERRORISTS! NOT A MASSACRE
2/20/2008 8:34 PM