Hey guys, Woody here.
I wandered out of my hut in the woods the other day, and I overheard some hunters talking about the financial crisis faced by the United States of America.
I went to my local library after hours to investigate. I snuck in through the basement window with the broken latch, and I perused their recent archive of periodicals. Turns out, yep, America is having a bit of a financial meltdown. A lot of solutions are floating around out there. Well, I've got a solid one for you. HEMP! Hemp can save America!
When the security guard busted in on me in the library, my hemp underwear protected my genital area from laceration when I jumped out the second floor window to evade his grasp. I was bleeding pretty bad, and I called McConaughey to have him pick me up on his electric scooter. He was swimming in the mud rivers of Brazil, so he couldn't help me out.
As I sprinted along the pavement, I thanked God I had remembered to wear my hemp socks, which prevented my feet from scraping against the asphalt as I dodged the police dogs that had been dispatched. I began howling at the animals, and I took advantage of their momentary confusion to light some hemp on fire. After a few seconds of inhaling that sweet hempy aroma, the dogs were mellow and just wanted to hang out with me. They followed me back to my hut, and we partied into the late evening.
America is addicted to oil, but man, we need to get addicted to HEMP!
I had a dream the other night that I invented something called Super Hemp. And this was awesome! Like hemp only more hempy. If you had a flat tire on your solar powered jeep, you could patch it up with Super Hemp. If you accidentally angered a police dog by playing with its tail too long and it bites your arm, you can just heal yourself with a bandage made of Super Hemp. If you governed a country by letting its most powerful corporations take advantage of the system to gain as much profits as possible at the expense of the general public, you can just smoke some Super Hemp and forget about how we're all gonna die pretty soon. Seriously, we're all dead. Real soon.
Hemp is so awesome!
Bill Clinton:
There's no question about it - hemp is not the answer, unless of course, the question is what is not the answer. Wait a minute . . . Okay, hemp is the answer, unless the question is what is not the answer. Whoa, Woody, what was that green leafy matter that you gave me? I just ate it along with a bowl of cookie dough and I'm starting to taste colors, hear excess and feel wooooozzzzziiiieeeeeeee . . . Thud! Zzzzzzzzzzzzz . . .
9/30/2008 1:59 PMTrauge W. May II:
I think the resources with the use of Hemp, could be a alternative fuel, as well as made to use to burn as another resource for energy. I mean DEA burns millions of the Hemp and or Marijuana plants in terms to stopping this drug to making it to the american's hands. Just think of the things we can do with Hemp, we could run a better country if we would stop looking at the negative-side of things... The people said there will NEVER be a Black President in the White House.. Well, whoever let that run out there mouth is probably biten their tougue a time or two. The time is NOW, to think of ways to come to terms, with saving the world. United States of America is the only country who can make the world understand the problems with our planet..
2/19/2009 7:08 PMI am in favor to back any resources, that we can use to help my son's civilization..
Trauge W. May II:
I think the resources with the use of Hemp, could be a alternative fuel, as well as made to use to burn as another resource for energy. I mean DEA burns millions of the Hemp and or Marijuana plants in terms to stopping this drug to making it to the american's hands. Just think of the things we can do with Hemp, we could run a better country if we would stop looking at the negative-side of things... The people said there will NEVER be a Black President in the White House.. Well, whoever let that run out there mouth is probably biten their tougue a time or two. The time is NOW, to think of ways to come to terms, with saving the world. United States of America is the only country who can make the world understand the problems with our planet..
2/19/2009 7:08 PMI am in favor to back any resources, that we can use to help my son's civilization..